Saturday, December 19, 2009

The Mighty Ducks

So last night I am scrolling through On-Demand pretty late at night bored and come across the original Mighty Ducks. Haven't seen the original in like 8 years so I hunkered down and watched it while finishing a chicken parm sub from Capone's in Weymouth. Tough to stay lean with a midnight chicken parm, I know. Here are some things to think about:

1. Hans' F#cking skate shop is the size of TD Banknorth Garden. I always thought it was like the basement of some shitty rink. Also, why is he sharpening skates at 1 oclock in the morning when Bombay comes to visit. Definitely a cover up for having women locked in the basement well and dressing up in sexy lingerie.

2. On the roster of the Mighty Ducks is the youngest Pete from Nickelodeon's hit show "the adventures of Pete and Pete". The main character from "Heavyweights" with Ben Stiller as Tony Perkins is a defenseman on the squad. I believe his name was Jerry in HWs.

3. Every kid on the team sucks. I used to be mesmerized at how nasty the Hawks were. Guess what, except for Adam Banks, they suck too.

4. Why didn't I ever question Gordon Bombay's hockey career? Best Pee Wee hockey player in the country, scored 198 points. Misses a penalty shot at the end of regulation in a state championship game and quits hockey. By the end of the movie, Bombay, now probably 35, gets a tryout with a minor league team. So a guy who hasn't skated since he was 10 has a shot to play professional hockey. This is the exact same thing as me trying out for NFL Europe. I once blocked 4 punts in a game against Hingham in Pop Warner (mostly because I was 45 pounds heavier than the poor bastard blocking me), so I guess that qualifies me for professional football.

5. I always remembered Charlie's mom being hotter. Definitely an upgrade in D2 with Coach Michelle McKay (Duluth, Minnesota) who was also their teacher.

6. How about the "flying V play"? I mean, really? I would have taken 25 steps and ran the lead duck in the V and put an end to that play pretty damn quick.

7. I still watched the whole thing and was on the edge of my seat when Charlie Conway went for his own version of the miserable "Triple Deke".

1 comment:

Nick said...

Way to wreck a childhood treasure. I hate that though, when you re-watch something you loved as a kid and see all the plot holes and poor acting. It's kind of like meeting a girl in a club, who in the morning is nothing like you thought she was.